Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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