I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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