so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
