I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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