How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
