Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
