trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize