Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
