i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
