And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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