well you can't waste a boner
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
