this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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