yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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