he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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