If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
