Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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