Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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