those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I had to cum in my sink.
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