i jhust puked up my retainher.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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