Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
