I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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