If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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