i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
