just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize