yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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