yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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