then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Houston, we have a blender
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
