please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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