just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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