Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize