what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
