2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Green mimosas i think yes
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
