what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
