Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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