I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize