People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
