Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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