I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
