Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
