i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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