I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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