You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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