talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize