Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
