Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
