shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
