exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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