She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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