I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize