That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
