oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
