Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Small penises have feelings too.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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